Can you imagine a demanding husband, a tight budget, and four needy children day in and day out as a stay-at-home mother a thousand miles from any of your relatives, friends, or alma maters?
That was my mom’s life. When she moved from Boston to Detroit as a young 1st grade teacher and bride with stars in her eyes, she never knew what lie ahead.
Feeling alone can be extremely difficult at times as YOU well know too…
We need a solid Christian community as well as time with God to recharge.
When my mom found that sweet spot of balance after a few years of emotional distress, life refilled her and we got the benefits of a stable and loving mother…
For as long as I can remember, she took some time just for her and the Lord every day. She kindly but firmly required some space so she could rest her eyes on and off and enjoy her worn out Bible by herself.
Can you relate?
Some of you are completely tracking with it.
Alone time is the bomb, right?
But for an extrovert,
Alone time can be a scary deal.
I’d never feel comfortable being by myself at home for fun.
Maybe for cleaning or bills or work, but for fun?
But what would you say if I told you that alone time just may save your life?
Jesus modeled it for us (Mark 1:35-37, Matthew 14:22-23) too. And we know there are many Bible verses about being still before the Lord.
“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him. (Psalm 37:7a).
Yes, we need accountability and time with others. It wasn’t ultimately good for man to be all alone. But spending time alone to recuperate, to be with God and to just rest, these things are life to us.
It’s a big difference.
And don’t you think it’s cool when modern studies corroborate on something God’s already taught us in the Bible?
Here are Five Reasons Why Taking Alone Time May Save Your Life, Too
- It builds confidence. If you always call or text or do social media when you’re alone, bored and restless, you may never know what you personally like to do. When you take time to find what you like to do on your own for rest, learning and growth, you can truly soar.
- Studies show that humans actually come up with their best ideas on their own most times versus when “groupthink” takes over, or getting stuck on other people’s ideas. Clearing ideas with others after you’ve given time to let the ideas come individually is a great way to make sure your solo idea is a good one.
- Solitude allows your brain to reboot and unwind. It’s a great way to decompress.
- Solitude helps improve concentration and increases productivity. Humans are wonderful company when the time is right but in addition to groupthink, you typically also get less done with the distraction of others.
- Being alone helps you to listen to God. Sure, it’s good practice to journal, work, exercise, or rest alone sometimes, but it’s also a great way to listen for God’s lead in your life. Others bring distraction and evasion at times. Being alone opens you up to the true needs in your life and to the support of your Father who can help you through whatever trials you face.
So while two can keep one another warm and we were ultimately made for a life in society, don’t forget to allow for some refuel time alone. This will allow you to grow in ways groups can never fulfill.
And for ideas on how to grab solitude regularly, read here!
- Get up or get in early. Wake up a half hour earlier than everyone else in the house and use the time to pray, to create, to produce, problem solve or find enjoyment alone. If you’re a night owl, you may also prefer this time. I’ve known people to grab creative hours mid-day which is my jam or to insist on a technology-free lunch hour so they can find their time alone then.
- Close your door. It sends the signal, even if you get a pup paw or child’s hand underneath it or your kids have found ways to unlock the doors. Just send them right back out or our better yet, set them up with a fan, a drink, and their own Bible or quiet activity in their rooms. They will learn from you that being alone is OK and even healthy for them.
- Schedule it on a calendar or phone reminder. Daily carve our time to just go it alone. Occasionally it won’t be possible but most days it will if you’re intentional.
- Do it during exercise. Put the kids in childcare at the gym, set them up with a movie at home, trade sitting with a parent, friend, or spouse, and get your workout burn and solo time together!
(Sources: The Bible, Huffpost, Psychology Today, and Entrepreneur Mag)