The Guy’s Guide to Being A Gentleman
What do women want? The infamous question begs for an answer in the likes of marriage therapists’ offices across the country. And my female clients are more than happy to share their opinions! 🙂
If you’re a little burnt out on the female opinion at the moment and you’d like to know more about our marriage coaching programs, click here.
Either way, enjoy the guide. May it bring you an extra happy weekend!
So guys, today you have a quick guide for being a ladies man. To be more specific, your leading lady’s man, and a gentleman at that.
Important Note: Guys, some of your women say they don’t care if you’re a gentleman to your face, but in my office, most of them reveal that it means a whole lot more than you think (and I have even been asked to write this message)! So…I hope these tips help you and your leading lady to have the kind of relationship you both want for the long haul. If you put these tips to good use, you shouldn’t be lacking for much.♡
#1 To be a true gentleman, say thank you to her when she helps you with something whether it’s out of the ordinary or not. “Thanks for ironing, working, doing your least fave chore, errands, cooking,” etc.
#2 Don’t forget to hold luggage and the car door open for her, especially if it’s freezing cold, drippy hot or raining (or if she’s pregnant)…She can do it but it’s so much sweeter when you do.
#3 Treat your woman publicly as well as you would the pretty young woman at the grocery store who you scoot aside so gallantly for with gentlemanlike suaveness when you’re alone. A gentleman remembers his wife’s reputation.
#4 Don’t forget a little romance before you rush into sex. Compliment her during the act and/or spend a moment cherishing her afterwards versus just shutting down if she likes that (and just ask if you wanna know). A gentleman knows there is a time and a place to be soft.
#5 Be silly. Ask her to play a game with you or tickle her (non-sexually) just impromptu sometimes instead of just TV watching. See my Relate book or program for fun ideas for making sure to add laughter in. A gentleman offers good company.
#6 Introduce her to whoever you’re talking to when she walks up. And not just as her name but as your wife. “Hi, this is my wife Jessica.” For bonus points, “This is my amazing wife Jessica.” (Over the top admittedly, but would be pretty cool if you’re in the doghouse).
#7 On social media, don’t friend someone else you’re struggling over like an ex or someone you are tempted by (and some women prefer you don’t friend their friends first). That conversation just got started in my private FB group right now also, totally free to join anytime ). Guard your heart and save it for her! This one is a hot topic I need your help on because the research is limited. Guys (and any gals reading) tell me your thoughts in a message or the comments!
#8 Watch or read Jane Austen with her….OK, totally snuck that one in to see if you were paying attention. That’s asking a LOT. But Jane is the classiest lady ever, and she really gets love, leaving you with a better vocab, wit and brain. I read a fun article today on why all guys should study her for brain power and personality assessment since she’s so right on with the female brain! Whatever you study, keep learning. A gentleman is always refining.
#9 Remember to ask her out on a date night at least monthly or make some space to hang out with her intentionally at home. Don’t just expect her to always manage the relationship romance in the day-to-day. A gentleman prepares.
#10 Just as I tell her to drop the Cinderella fantasy of being ridden off into the sunlight, you too need to remember something. If she’s really busy or she doesn’t have a huge spending budget she probably won’t look perfectly manicured with perfect hair at all times. Try to make her feel special anyway and encourage her in self-care! She is your bride and maybe even the mother of your children and in those ways, carries intrinsic beauty inherently if you think about it. She’s not airbrushed but…she’s real and she’s yours, which in my opinion is a lot more exciting. Try to focus on what you do like versus what you don’t and for special requests you have for her, refer to my 7 Tips for Communication.
#11 This one is huge. The more you treat her like a lady, the more she will act like one. If you want a feminine, soft, sweet, lady, do steps 1-10 and I guarantee she will start exuding more soft and ladylike manners, just like she was made to do.
Lead well gentlemen! And enjoy the beautiful results! ♡
